| 
         My 
          Thoughts On Being A Switch  
           
      Author: LadyMist/mist` © Feb. 12, 1999  | 
    
|  I 
        look back and wish I had a nickle for every time I have heard that a good 
        submissive can not be an effective Domme, or even a good Domme.  
        I am a good Domme, at least I am told so by my subs. They wouldn't all 
        just be sucking up would they? And being a sub myself, I know the other 
        side of the head space and implements. There is nothing like swinging 
        a flogger and getting a thrill from knowing exactly how it feels, in essence 
        vicariously experiencing the submissive side of the Scene.  My switch 
        tendencies are limited to one head space per person.  What I mean 
        by this is that I do not Domme and sub to the same person. This eliminates 
        the retribution factor; however, this is not my motivation.  As of 
        yet I have not found the person that inspired both feelings. I either 
        want to beat you or get beat by you. ‘EG’ 
         I am 
          not attempting to say that I am the only type of switch or that mine 
          is the only way people can switch.  This is my way, my experiences, 
          thoughts and feelings.  I have met others that switch that approach 
          our lifestyle differently with success. Sometimes more than I have had, 
          sometimes less.   I found my dominant side in college. I had the privilege of attending an all female institution and reaping the benefits thereof. My Abnormal Psychology professor became my mentor and trainer (after I had passed from her class of course.) She was a very private member of the D/s community in the southern US due to fear of losing her children and alienating her family. The very reason I find that most of us here in the Bible belt hide in the very back of the closet. She helped me find my way through my limits as a Domme, enabled me to learn the various techniques needed to wield implements with some safety, all without intruding on my relationship with my first girlfriend and later… collared slave. She taught 
          as well as demonstrated how a chain of command can work in a multiple 
          or ployamorous situation.  And once that pecking order is established 
          (however the members - or dominants ‘G’ - decide to do it) and it is 
          clear how one can move up (or down) the chain, peace can be summarily 
          achieved in the Dom/me’s household.  For example, in my current 
          situation I am always submissive to Milord whom I have been married 
          and collared to for 6 years.  I am responsible for his house, his  
           I graduated 
          from college and my submissive went back to Australia but the teaching 
          of my mentor has stayed with me.  As a result, I could handle losing 
          my first collared one with grace, helping her find a Domme that was 
          respected in her country.  I have continued to grow as a Domme. 
          I have   The teaching 
          I still carry with me and for which I am most grateful is the ability 
          to use implements properly. My mentor had a varied network of friends 
          with many years of technical experience under their collective belts. 
          By the time I had moved from pillows and posts to flesh and bone I knew  
           The only thing about being a switch that I have had trouble growing into is the fact that we seem to be viewed as a different species (albeit a less desirable one) to dominants. “Normally I am not attracted to switches” “Why?” the imp in mist will ask. “They are not easy taken into subspace.” “They are more inclined to be SAM’s” “They are not as easy taken over and broken” on and on ad nauseum. Does that mean we are stronger, more informed, less submissive? I believe that the wannabe’s in question might think so. I am no stronger and no more informed than any other established submissive. I am different. And who among us has never had to come to terms with the fact that we are different? Hearing 
          that I am less of a submissive due to the fact that I can and do Domme 
          does hurt and does bother me.  When I give my gift, it is with 
          no less care and trust as any other sub.  And I do not, ever, want 
          to switch and turn the tables on him or her that has placed a collar 
          on me. Although these   Hearing 
          that I can not be an effective Domme does not faze me much.  Those 
          who utter these things are not likely to ever feel my presence and I 
          do not expect respect.  I earn it from those who choose to grant 
          me their gift.  And to date not one has ever said that they have 
          suffered neglect in the collar   Yes, 
          I am complicated. Yes, I do have the weakness of speaking up when something 
          is being done that can harm. (For example: tails wrapping around to 
          the front of my neck.) Yes, I do suffer from pride.  The negative 
          type that says I can withstand anything a Dom/me can do. Yes, I do cherish 
          and   If certain 
          people or actions inspire you towards submitting, and still others make 
          you want to pull out a flogger and go to town, you might be a switch 
          too.  This is not a bad thing. I have had one submissive liken 
          switches to diamonds, multifaceted and precious. I am not sure what 
          face I show the    | 
    
  
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