For some of us, choosing this lifestyle is an expression of what our fantasies have been for a good part, if not all, of our lives. Others find that the fantasies started later in life, and still others just fantasize about it now and again. There are many different "levels" in this lifestyle, none of them better or worse than the others, except two: being on a different level than what really suits you, or being with someone who wants and needs different things from the lifestyle than you do. It is very important that you really think about what you are really seeking from the lifestyle. Fantasies about tying people up, does not necessarily mean that you want to be the Dom/Top, it could be that your subconscious has not accepted that it is "ok" to be submissive, so it only knows how to express itself in the manner it does. Likewise, the opposite. You need to look beyond what just the fantasy itself is about, think about what it is exactly about that fantasy that is turning you on, and take it from there. One of the most important lessons we, as humans, can ever learn is to accept that you have a right to be happy, a right to have your desires met, fulfilled and surpassed, and a right to be acknowledged for who you really are.
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Page by: Raven Shadowborne © 2001 Graphics & Buttons by: Aylissa Cair & Raven Shadowborne © 1999 & 2001 |
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