How Did I Become A Dominant?

Author: Mistress Michelle © 2003

Used With Permission Of The Author(S)

Mistress Michelle's web site

More of Mistress Michelle's articles can be found at the D/s World E-zine


I did not become a dominant by accident! It was party fate and it was a combination of three factors. The first factor is any hypothesis and only theory, but I'm sure it was a important part in my path towards the dominant side of B&D.

A) Physiology

We all have male and female hormones; science has proven that the behavioural traits come from these hormones. Meaning male hormones produce an aggressive behaviour and female hormones produce a passive behaviour. Some females produce xxy factor or xxyy factor or in different combinations other than the normal xy factor. The only time this factor becomes normal or there is a excessive amount of female hormone secretion is during menstruation. At this time females become less aggressive and more passive. It has been found that many lesbians also have this hormone in balance as well as many bi-females. I was born a twin and do have this slight in balance of hormones which possibly contributes to my dominant behaviour.

There are also other factors we must consider, the next being;

B) Cultural up bringing

My father was a executive for one of the big three. (GMC) He held a responsible job. He was a very dominant, in the sense of job responsibilities and very aggressive at his work, where as my mother was submissive and a housewife. Because of my fathers job, he worked constant hours and I did not see him as much as my Mother. My father worked a many weekends and I probably only saw him a few times a month. My Mother hardly ever disciplined me as a child; it all came from my Father. Because I rarely saw my Father and because discipline came from him I associated more with my father than my Mother. My Father was very strict when I was young, but as I became older he was very lenient . I think this up bringing was a also a cause of my Dominant behaviour.

Factors one and two are only theories; I know factor three was a definite cause in my dominant behaviour.

C) Psychological

My metal state caused from environment or circumstance, How my path began into B&D also inter links why I am a dominant. There are several reasons why and this will probably apply to every dominant in the scene as well as submissive.

My first introduction began years ago. I had a friend who often persuaded me to dress in black nylons, garter belt and black bra, to enhance my sexual desires. He would often show me magazines of girls who wore this attire, at the time bondage magazines rarely existed, if at all! I would dress in front of him and we would have sex. It seemed like a progression and soon I found myself dabbling in exotic make up and hairstyles. From there we progressed into oriental style rope bondage. We played with rope for a few years and progressed into gags, nipple torture, spanking, whipping, suspension, dildoes and various forms of humiliation and other forms of B&D. Magazines had also come a long way from rag sheets to glossy covers and full colour pages. It was through those magazines that the both of us started to meet with others of the same interest. However the people we met were not yet a evolved into the scene as we were.

After five or six years being into B&D my interest changed and I lost contact with my friend. More than likely this dominant nature was always present, but I all it needed was something to nurture it along. In time I enjoyed being a dominant, I enjoyed oriental style rope bondage, spanking, whipping, and nipple torture from the beginning. Later I progressed into cock torture, hoods, gags, weights, harnesses, public humiliation, electricity, and golden showers. Then I learned about high volume enemas and colonics. Then into piercing! So you can see I'm well versed in the B&D arts. And B&D is a art! It is not for everyone, it takes years of experience and knowledge. Do not attempt anything alone if you are a beginner. I do this every day, it is my lifestyle and I have learned over the years. So summing up why I am a dominant, it is my destiny. After reading how I became a dominant you may see a correlation with your life and mine, a parallel. But it not only takes aptitude, knowledge, experience and other inner qualities, it takes the ability and desire to learn more. Dominant's can become limited; the only way to gain is to learn from others. Of course attire, equipment and having knowledge and experience. I have excelled into this kind of Mistress!


The above article is copyright to Mistress Michelle, all rights reserved. Please do not copy, reprint or post without her permission.




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